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   747 Makes London-Chicago Flight With No Reported Delays

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1/3/2004 12:00 am

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Amusing

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Entered 1/3/2004, Updated 1/3/2004

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CHICAGO - The aviation world has been left in shock today as a British Airways 747 departed from London's Heathrow Airport and made the routine 9-hour flight to Chicago's O'Hare International without any reported delays, suspicious activities, or other possible problems. "It really is quite a feat", mused British Prime Minister Tony Blair. "This truly is a once in a lifetime experience for both Britons and Americans, and I hope citizens on both sides of the pond are reveling as we speak". President Bush could not be reached for comment, as he is currently embroiled in a fierce primary election campaign against fellow Republican Edie Bukewihge. Sources do indicate that the success of flight will undoubtedly be somehow linked to the war on terror during the campaign and might give Bush the extra push needed to overcome Bukewihge. Not all people across the world are happy, however. Mohammed Ali Aziz, a high-ranking official in Al-Qaida, was dismayed by the successful flight. "I should not be saying this", he lamented to Al-Jazeera television, "but we may be losing the holy struggle. We no longer live in a world where Westerners curse us for delaying their flight 15 minutes, or having to put up with minor inconveniences. What will our divine purpose be if our actions no longer put Americans through annoying random searches at airport security gates? It's madness, I tell you, and Allah will not be pleased! You should see Osama. He hasn't been so down since they announced 'Friends' was going off the air". Certainly, this is a great victory for both America and aviation in general.


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